I CAN SEE YOU NOW

“Something’s terribly wrong,” I shuddered as I approached the stop sign.

Instead of the four white letters in the center of the familiar red sign, a gray blob appeared.

This was almost four years ago. The spring of 2008.

When I got home I called my eye doctor. He immediately ordered some photos of the back of my eye and confirmed a diagnosis of wet age-related macular degeneration or ARMD, as it’s called.

This eye disease is caused by leakage of tiny blood vessels in back of the eye which lead to swelling and loss of central vision.

Unfortunately, Corrective lenses do not seem to help with clarity and focus as they do for nearsightedness or farsightedness.

Had my vision loss occurred even five years earlier, my eyes would have continued to get worse, but around 2005 new treatments for this disease arrived on the scene.

The treatment for ARMD involves injections into the eye of a medication to stem the bleeding and reduce swelling in the eye.

I knew I had to save my vision, but the thought of injections in my eye, made me shudder.

In my next blog, I’ll tell readers about what the treatment is like. Meanwhile, if any readers detect a change in vision, contact your eye doctor immediately. It may save your sight.

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LATE AGAIN!

“Late again,” I thought as I pulled into the church parking lot.

One of the things I enjoy on weekends is welcoming the congregation and reading the announcements at church before the service begins.

As I peeked in the sanctuary, I could see that the service was underway. Someone had filled in for me.

Generally, Bill and I arrive at church a tad on the early side.

But that particular Sunday, Bill recovering from an unfortunate encounter with a tree, so it fell to me to keep track of the time.

When Bill and I leave the house together, the sequence runs something like this:

Bill: “Are you about ready?”
Val: “Almost. Give me one more minute.”
Bill: “I’ll wait in the car.”
Val: (inspecting Bill’s outfit,) “Don’t you think you should wear something better for church?’
Bill: “This is fine. We have to leave now.”

And off we go!

But this particular Sunday, this usual, familiar comforting sequence did not take place. Left to my own devices I lost track of time.

It boiled down to not getting my act together.

What had I done in this 15 minute gap?
I lost those minutes by:

Hemming and hawing about what to wear.

Finding two matching socks.

Hunting for my good coat.

Noticing a big spot on the front of my good coat.

Finding another coat.

Checking to see that the stove was off.

For the next hour, I tried to concentrate on the service, but reminders of my lateness intruded.

After the service, I apologized for my lateness.

“We’re just glad you here and that you are OK,” my friends reassured.

How sweet those words sounded!

How comforting to be welcomed by friends in spite of our shortcomings!

Readers, what shortcomings have your friends accepted.

What was that like for you?

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A DIFFERENT KING OF SPRING BREAK

About this time next week, our 21 year old granddaughter Meredith will be leaving for India.

She will spend her spring break at Mother Teresa’s Home for the Destitute and Dying.

When her Dad heard of Meredith’s plans, he joked, “I’ll bet she’s just saying she’s going to India. She’ll probably be sunning on the beach in Florida.”

When I was in college, that’s exactly what I would have wanted to do—spend time at the beach, getting a tan!

But an admirable generosity is alive in today’s young people which gives hope to this fractured, troubled world.

It was just before Christmas that Meredith announced her plans to work in Calcutta. She said she didn’t want any Christmas presents—only donations to pay for her airfare.

Meredith will be going to Calcutta with a group of students from Regis University in Denver, where she is a senior nursing student. Not all going on this venture are nursing students. Perhaps all that is needed is a caring heart and willingness to serve.

God bless, Meredith.

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I CAN HEAR YOU NOW

Last week I took the plunge and got fitted for much needed hearing aids.

My hearing loss had been gradual, but was bumped into a severe mode from a recent encounter with a badly behaving, screechy cell phone.

Since the cell phone incident, I found myself cut off from parts of everyday life.

Phone calls sounded garbled. I couldn’t pick up jokes and side chit chat of friends. Trying to follow what people were saying at large social conversations became a challenge.

Since the recent hearing loss, I cranked the TV volume to the highest setting. Bill and I stopped renting movies because most dialogues sounded muffled.

A trip to my doctor and to an audiologist confirmed that I had hearing losses in both ears, with a more significant loss in the ear that endured the blast from the cell phone.

Still—for a variety of reasons—I put off buying hearing aids. It seemed that a lot of people were not completely happy with their hearing aids. Everyone seemed to have an old set “that didn’t work too well.”

Then, a few weeks ago, some new findings on hearing loss lit a fire under me.

Researchers at Johns Hopkins School of Medicine and at the National Institute on Aging showed “a direct relationship between the participants’ degree of hearing loss and their risk of later developing dementia or Alzheimer’s disease.”

Since my mother had suffered from Alzheimer’s disease, I didn’t want to stack the deck against me anymore than it was.

Last Thursday I visited the audiologist, who had the results of my hearing tests, and about an hour late I walked out of the office and once again felt a part of this wonderful world.

Unfortunately many with hearing loss are cut off from the opportunity to hear well because hearing aids are costly and are not covered by Medicare.

Readers, I’d like to hear about your experiences with hearing loss. Have hearing aids helped you? Is it the expense that prevents you or a family member from getting fitted with hearing aids? Is it the stigma of wearing hearing aids?

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TOO LARGE TO GIFT WRAP

Over the past months, as I slipped the papers from their plastic sacks, slick full page advertisements splayed onto our kitchen table.

I was offed ten dollar coupons, extra shopping hours, power hour specials, early bird specials, night owl shopping, and three day only sales.

If I had young children, I might have taken advantage of these sales and found a burst of excitement and joy in such shopping.

But in recent times, these ads made me wonder if we’re gotten off track somehow.

Sure, I know retailers depend on Christmas sales, but I still wonder what’s behind the frenzied shopping, this rush to acquire this year’s hottest product.

Is there’s a deep need that we are trying to fulfill?

Could it have something to do with our obsession with happiness?

Ask a parent today what they want for their children, and the response is often “I just want them to be happy.”

Is happiness the ultimate goal in life? Or do we really seek something more meaningful?

We can own the best of everything, yet be filled with unhappiness and discontent.

We think we will be happy if we win the lottery or get the newest electronic device for Christmas.

But in the famous 1978 study of lottery winners, it was found that one year after winning the lottery, winners ended up no happier than those who hadn’t won.

Yes, things were different in l978. But some things remain constant.

Beyond a certain necessary income level, extra money or possessions do not seem to bring happiness.

Part of the problem is that material happiness is often fleeting

I’m often delighted and surprised by a new possession, then the novelty wears off and I want the next new thing that comes along.

Don’t get me wrong. I like nice things.

But sometimes I have to remind myself that much of our happiness can’t be bought.

It is the result of that challenging, sometimes frustrating, ultimately rewarding endeavor that fits any budget.

It’s that gift that’s too big to gift wrap.

It’s called love.

I wish all my readers much love during these Holy Days.

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THE GIFT OF THE GRANDCHILDREN

A few days ago, I was talking to my friend Jean about her recent visit to her grandchildren in California.

It was one of those easy conversations—catching up on each others’ lives, ideas and books we’d read.

Towards the end of our visit, we talked about ideas for Holiday gift giving.

“I tried something new with our older grandchildren last year,” Jean noted.

“What did you do?” I asked, always looking for new ideas.

“In addition to their regular gifts, I gave each of them $25 to buy a holiday gift for someone in need or for a charity.”

“Great idea! So what did they do?”

“Well, Meaghan, whose 14 now, gave to a Giving Tree Charity at her Church.

And John, 12, is really into tennis. So he gave his money to one of Rafeal Nadal Charities, which encourages autistic children to become involved in playing tennis.”

Jean wasn’t sure what organizations Meaghan and John will choose this year, but she’s eager to find out.

She says she likes the fact that Meaghan and John do some research about worthwhile charities before making their selections.

This is the first year that Jean has given fourth grade granddaughter Kylie $25 to give to a charity.

“Kylie has already decided on her gifts. She will donate half of her money to the Larimer County Human Society and the second half to Children’s Hospital in Denver.”

A career education, Jean has a keen sense of when children can fully understand the concept of donating to a charity. She knows that her two youngest granddaughters soon will be old enough to receive $25 to give to a charitable organization.

This will bring Jean’s tally up to five gift giving grandchildren.

So within a few years five or more deserving charities will be the beneficiaries of Jean and her grandchildren.

But perhaps the real gift is that Jean’s grandchildren are taking another step–first started by their parents at home—and now expanded by Jean—in making the world a better place.

Readers, what traditions of giving are part of your family tradition?

Let us hear from you.

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DAY OF SURGERY

The day of my toe surgery arrived.

In two previous blogs, I discussed the saga of my misshapen claw-like toe which recently acquired the diagnosis: HAMMERTOE.

This particular toe had always been longer than my big toe—making it a bit of a curiosity to our daughters as they were growing up.

Myths abound about this type of toe, officially called Morton’s Toe.

The myth I liked best was that having a long second toe meant that I had royal blood coursing through my veins.

I always hoped that the royal blood angle would give me some leverage when it came to getting my husband and kids to obey me. It did not.

The toe simply became known as Mom’s Royal Toe.

All the Royal Toe ever did for me was to embarrass my kids when I wore open toed sandals in public.

But age exacts a painful toll—even on Royal Toes. By last summer, the Royal Toe had acquired a claw-like shape—an advantage if I had to climb a tree really fast—but otherwise the crooked toe made it painful to wear shoes.

I visited a couple of podiatrists to find options for treatment.

One option was a surgical procedure which involved placing a rod in the crooked toe to straighten it. The rod, protruding from the tip of the toe, would remain in place for a couple of months. Ouch!

Illustrations for this procedure made me shudder.

But there was hope. My podiatrist also offered a less invasive option: a tenotomy. He would snip two toe tendons, thus releasing the toe from its claw-like grip.

Fortunately, the toe was limber enough for this procedure. Once a toe becomes rigid, this procedure is not an option.

“After surgery your toe will be long again so you’ll have to buy shoes in a larger size after the surgery,” my podiatrist advised. “The worst part of the procedure is getting the injection to numb the area. After that, it’s pretty easy.”

I don’t like to hear a doctor say the words WORST PART, because that means there IS a WORST PART!

My doctor generally does these surgeries in the late afternoon, so that the patient isn’t inclined to run in a marathon or Iron Man Contest that evening.

“By the next day, you can resume normal activities as long as you keep the toe dry and the bandage in place.”

This sounded pretty good to me, so by 4:30 on a fall afternoon, I found myself sitting in a surgical chair with my foot bathed in a brown Betadine solution.

The needle on the tray looked formidable. Additionally alarming was the strange brown bottle with a nozzle that sat nearby.

“What’s that?” I asked pointing at the strange bottle and nozzle.

“Ethyl chloride. I’ll spray this on your toe so you won’t feel the injection.”

“I think I’d better not look.”

“OK. We’ll tilt the chair back.”

Bracing for the worst, I laid back, closed my eyes and felt a cool liquid bathe my foot. It actually felt sort of good.

“Tell me when you’re going to put the needle in,” I said after about a minute.

“It’s already in.”

Relief swept over me. There was no pain—only coolness on the outside and a feeling of fluid coursing within my foot.

When the tendons were cut, I could feel a tugging but no pain.

Fifteen minutes later I walked out of the podiatrist’s office and Bill drove me home.

I took it easy until bedtime. In the middle of the night I felt the numbness drain out of my foot. Then, nothing. No pain. No soreness.

When the bandage was removed the next week, the toe was no longer claw- like. Once again it was straight and long. It towered over my big toe. Regal status was restored.

And will remain healthy if I don’t succumb to wearing tight shoes!

As for open toe sandals displaying the restored long toe—I’ll wear them with pride!

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THE TOE UNDERGOES SURGERY

In my last blog, I wrote about the tentacle-like appendage on my right foot—a second toe that’s longer than my Big Toe—a condition known as Morton’s toe.

Depending on who you ask, this toe condition denotes:
1. An inclination towards criminal activity
2. A lower place on the evolutionary chain
3. Royal blood

I guess my Mom hadn’t heard of the first two possibilities because she told me my anomaly meant that I had royal blood coursing through my veins.

When I had a family of my own, the Toe simply became known as Mom’s Royal Toe.

Over the years the Toe continued to tower over the Big Toe. But recently things got ugly.

The Appendage became crooked and no long fit—Cinderella like—into slippers. In short, the Toe had become a Royal Pain.

The Toe was officially dethroned and demoted to Hammer Toe status—this meant trouble lurked around the castle walls.

Once again I went to my favorite quick source of medical advice—the net.

I found that Hammer Toes are fairly common and can be treated in a variety of ways—depending on the severity of the condition.

I tried a couple of non surgical approaches such as keeping the Toe limber and wearing open-toe sandals. This helped but didn’t seem like a permanent solution—especially with winter just around the corner.

I figured I’d better not tip toe too long around this issue, so I marched the wayward Toe into my podiatrist’s office to look at other options including surgery.

After some initial reluctance—after all surgery on one’s toe doesn’t sound like a cake walk—I scheduled an appointment for surgery.

Stay tuned for the blow by blow details of THE SURGERY.

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THE CASE OF THE MYSTERIOUS ROYAL TOE

When I was about eight, I pointed to the second toe on my right foot and asked: “Why is this toe so much longer than my “big” toe?’

“That toe’s longer because you have royal blood,” my Mom said. “It’s called a Royal Toe.”

Wow! I’d hit the jack pot. Having a royal toe topped the whole kit and caboodle of childhood treasures: my collection of Bugs Bunny comics, my Tom Mix secret decoder ring and my box of mica and my striped rocks.

Over the years I didn’t think too much about the Royal Toe, though I savored the notion of my royal heritage when my friends Gail and Jane wouldn’t play with me.

When Bill and I first started dating, the subject of dental cavities came up. Being a survivor of many dental horrors—I averaged three or four new cavities every six months until I ran out of teeth—I was flummoxed when Bill said he’ had only three cavities in his whole life.

“Braggart,” I thought.

Then I one-upped him.

“Well, I have a Royal Toe,” I said.

“I’ve never heard of such a thing.”

“Well, it’s true.”

I didn’t volunteer to show him the toe, that day. The truth was that the top of that toe flared out like an exotic mushroom cap. And besides, I hadn’t changed my socks in a while.

So far our marriage has survived the exotic contours of the Royal Toe, but Bill never quite bought into the noble heritage story.

Over the past few months, the toe has become bothersome so I did a little sleuthing on the net and found some interesting facts about Royal Toes. Technically this toe abnormality is called Morton’s Toe, but I think Royal Toe has a better flair to it.

Stay tuned for the next breath taking, astonishing episode of the toe saga.

In the mean time, I want to hear from those of you who were born with a long second toe—or a Royal Toe.

How has it affected your life? Do you wear your Royal Toe proudly? Are you in therapy because of your toe?

Chime in!

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TAKE TIME FOR ICE CREAM

I opened the freezer a few minutes ago. The box of ice cream bars was empty.

I fished around in the ice buildup hoping to find a stray ice cream bar, but no such luck.

I’ve always loved ice cream, but it seemed to taste best when I was a child.

Back then, the moms on the block must have had a pact or something, because whenever the Good Humor Truck came our way, the moms on our block had a nickel or dime ready so that my buddies and I could each buy a treat after supper.

Frozen ice bars cost a nickel and ice cream items were a dime.

In most l940’s houses freezer space was limited to two small ice trays, so the only path to ice cream was to our beloved Shapiro’s Ice Cream and Candy Store six blocks away or to the Good Humor Truck which never failed to stop on our block.

At seven or eight years of age, we kids were pretty skinny from running around all day, and I think the moms were trying to fatten us up.

Summer after summer, we stayed skinny and the coins for ice cream stayed at the ready.

My favorite was the Toasted Almond Bar which had a magical, almost mystic, quality to it as it emerged from the truck’s dry ice steam.

My friends and I sat on the curb, slowly savoring our purchases, nibbling off the chocolate shell or almond coating, letting the first bit of ice cream melt on our tongues, and licking dribbles as ice cream melted. It was heaven.

Somehow, ice cream has never tasted as good as it did back then. It was as if the world stood still during ice cream time.

Then, just the other day, I realized why ice cream tasted so good back then.

It wasn’t that the world stood. It was that we stood still.

We slowed down, made time, paused and enjoyed.

Lately, I sprint from one thing to the next. Even when eating ice cream.

Recently, I found myself hastily chewing an ice cream bar while working at the computer. It dawned on me that it’s almost irreverent to chew ice cream.

I realized it was time to slow down and savor the flavor.

As soon as I restock my freezer.

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